Joan Crawford’s Tips For an Entertaining Party
Really,y I can’t disagree. Get planning your Christmas parties, bitches.
|by Anonymous||reply 54||11/26/2017|
I’ll be the bearded painter.
|by Anonymous||reply 1||11/23/2017|
Love her clear fridge.
|by Anonymous||reply 2||11/23/2017|
|by Anonymous||reply 3||11/23/2017|
Just have some people over and get ’em good and sauced up. Voila!
|by Anonymous||reply 4||11/23/2017|
I am the scary Keene paintings in her chic NYC apartment, especially the Joan portrait.
Joan was a Keene enthusiast.
|by Anonymous||reply 5||11/23/2017|
Well, I’d invite some corporate presidents and my friends from Brussels. if I knew any (?)
|by Anonymous||reply 6||11/23/2017|
And I’d certainly invite HER, if she’d stay till the end.
|by Anonymous||reply 7||11/23/2017|
I just wanted you to know, Joan, that your book, My Way of Life, was one, big (not so) humble-brag!
Nice ‘tips’ – that everyone can relate to surely, right?
|by Anonymous||reply 8||11/23/2017|
Real pets may spoil your parties with their animalistic ways. instead, replace them with stuffed ones.
|by Anonymous||reply 9||11/23/2017|
When entertaining, the thoughtful hostess serves a variety of soft drinks for the teetotalers and [italic]the younger set[/italic]. I recommend Pepsi in 16oz bottles, Pepsi in 8oz bottles, and the popular Pepsi in cans. Sure to please everyone.
|by Anonymous||reply 10||11/24/2017|
Oh, and NO Red Weirdos.
|by Anonymous||reply 11||11/24/2017|
What a sad picture of Joan surrounded by her Keane , Oscar, some other award, Pepsi bottle, and quite possibly a bronzed Pepsi bottle.
|by Anonymous||reply 12||11/24/2017|
Yep, that’s pretty much it.
|by Anonymous||reply 13||11/24/2017|
I’ll be the hippie with the unwashed feet!
|by Anonymous||reply 14||11/24/2017|
R13 I remember when I was a very little girl our house caught on fire I’ll never forget the look on my father’s face as the flesh melted off.
|by Anonymous||reply 15||11/24/2017|
R13 “But what about the verse that goes, ‘I remember when i drunk those 17 pints of Guinness and had such a fine time til the world spun til i heaved til it felt like the skull would tear right through the front of me face and I woke up in a puddle of me own vomit with a marching band and the eunuchs of St. Phillips playing All For Me Grog within the recesses of me addled brain. and after that I axed meself, Is That All There Is? If that’s all there is then I don’t think I could dance, much less shake out the booze. So what’ll it be, the .38 or the 12 gauge, me friend. ‘”
|by Anonymous||reply 16||11/24/2017|
R5, Yes, and the plastic covering on the sofa, too.
|by Anonymous||reply 17||11/24/2017|
She is trying to sound like Auntie Mame with her “eclectic” mix of guests. Except, it comes off as the evil and shallow Lucille Ball Mame version.
|by Anonymous||reply 18||11/24/2017|
Did you notice that in that shot of JC posing coyly under her arbor, she was sitting on a sheet of a paper to protect her chic dress and tender bottom from the chilly and dank stone bench.
|by Anonymous||reply 19||11/24/2017|
If a hairdresser isn’t available to attend is a florist or an interior decorator okay?
|by Anonymous||reply 20||11/24/2017|
Lucy is the definitive Mame.
|by Anonymous||reply 21||11/24/2017|
No. Dirty. Hippies.
|by Anonymous||reply 22||11/24/2017|
Lol at the dirty hippies.
|by Anonymous||reply 23||11/24/2017|
[quote]What a sad picture of Joan surrounded by her Keane , Oscar, some other award, Pepsi bottle, and quite possibly a bronzed Pepsi bottle.
Don’t forget the plastic slipcover on the divan. Even if one is not a filthy, smelly hippie. one is not permitted to rest one’s bottom directly on the fabric of Ms. Crawford’s furniture.
|by Anonymous||reply 24||11/24/2017|
She was not lying when she said she adds a splash of vodka to. EVERYTHING! And not just for parties!
|by Anonymous||reply 25||11/24/2017|
[quote]When entertaining, the thoughtful hostess serves a variety of soft drinks for the teetotalers and the younger set. I recommend Pepsi in 16oz bottles, Pepsi in 8oz bottles, and the popular Pepsi in cans. Sure to please everyone.
I don’t see any Pepsi in that fridge, Joan!
|by Anonymous||reply 26||11/24/2017|
Spanish sow-sage makes a lovely hors d’oeuvre!
|by Anonymous||reply 27||11/24/2017|
Fave Joan story: Christina comes home from school one day and is alarmed by a shirtless bald man in the hallway. ‘Christina’ says Joan ‘ say hello to your Uncle Yul.’
|by Anonymous||reply 28||11/24/2017|
Good for Joan if she got to ride on the Yule Log.
|by Anonymous||reply 29||11/24/2017|
r7 That floor doesn’t look clean to me.
|by Anonymous||reply 30||11/24/2017|
|by Anonymous||reply 31||11/24/2017|
Oh but it’s very exciting, when you’re young at your first dance, and you’re sitting on a small quilt chair with your eyes lowered, terrified that you’d be a wallflower. And suddenly you see two black shoes, a white waistcoat, a face, it speaks.
|by Anonymous||reply 32||11/24/2017|
How can you just not love and adore her? Joan is everything. That clear fridge. adding a splash of vodka to everything.
|by Anonymous||reply 33||11/24/2017|
I’m bringing the perfect hostess gift!
|by Anonymous||reply 34||11/24/2017|
R28, I never knew that! Thanks! They sound made for each other.
[quote]Joan sees The King and I in New York and visits Yul Brynner backstage. The next day he sends her a photo of himself with a hard-on; they–surprise!–begin a brief affair.
|by Anonymous||reply 35||11/24/2017|
I agree wholeheartedly: A SPASH OF VODKA MAKES EVERY GATHERING MORE ENJOYABLE.
|by Anonymous||reply 36||11/24/2017|
Fresh cut flowers are a must!
|by Anonymous||reply 37||11/24/2017|
[quote]When Joan finds out Carl Johnes is having friends over to watch Maureen Stapleton in the TV movie “Queen of the Stardust Ballroom,” Joan provides him with an ice-filled cooler of Pepsi and Diet Pepsi, chipping the ice and filling the cooler herself.
|by Anonymous||reply 38||11/24/2017|
Joan reading her favorite holiday poem to Christina before the big holiday gathering:
“And the children were hung by the chimney with care”
|by Anonymous||reply 39||11/24/2017|
Always, always, make a grand entrance Joan.
|by Anonymous||reply 40||11/24/2017|
Why does everyone always hide when I carve the meat?
|by Anonymous||reply 41||11/24/2017|
I love her. Despite her shitty relationship with two of her children, she seems like a good hostess and an interesting person. I’ve listened to most of her recordings from “My Way of Life” and in my opinion she comes off as very practical and self aware.
|by Anonymous||reply 42||11/24/2017|
[quote]How can you just not love and adore her?
Because she was a self absorbed, sociopath alcoholic. She’s gross.
It’s about time Joanie realized that what’s attractive on stage need not necessarily be attractive off.
|by Anonymous||reply 43||11/24/2017|
One generally can’t go wrong with a glamorous party pajama, however, a playful hot-pants-and-string-tie-blouse ensemble will signal to [italic]the younger set[/italic] that you’re game for their Pepsi-fueled shindigs.
|by Anonymous||reply 44||11/24/2017|
And then have Donna Reed over to clean up in her cocktail dress, heels and pearls. it is the 50’s after all.
|by Anonymous||reply 45||11/24/2017|
[quote]One generally can’t go wrong with a glamorous party pajama, however, a playful hot-pants-and-string-tie-blous – e ensemble will signal to the younger set that you’re game for their Pepsi-fueled shindigs.
R14 Caveat: This “urban romper” look kind of only works with spike heels.
|by Anonymous||reply 46||11/24/2017|
Naturally, r46. I find it perfect for a clambake, a hootenanny, a what-have-you. the sort of get-togethers that [italic]the younger set[/italic] seem to favor.
But, no unwashed hippies, PLEASE!
|by Anonymous||reply 47||11/25/2017|
No unwashed hippies. EVER. Of course, if a masculine, hirsute man has a little honest sweat, well, as a woman you expect it. And if his large uncut member has a bit of an undesirable fragrance. Just take a clean washcloth and clean him — make it a part of your lovemaking, before you plunge his manhood into your private woman place.
|by Anonymous||reply 48||11/25/2017|
R44 Could I wear my hostess pants, with a crushy belt and some ballet slippers?
|by Anonymous||reply 49||11/25/2017|
Joan looks great in r5’s photo. Love her Oscar and Pepsi bottle full of vodka directly in front of her.
|by Anonymous||reply 50||11/25/2017|
|by Anonymous||reply 51||11/25/2017|
r49, I’d forego the belt and opt, instead, for a beautiful embroidered tunic, or even a chic peasant blouse you see some of the more [italic]au courant[/italic] hostesses wearing. A satin ballet slipper sounds both practical and [italic]of the moment[/italic].
And, Dear Heart, if truly in doubt, go topless.
|by Anonymous||reply 52||11/25/2017|
[quote]R49 Could I wear my hostess pants, with a crushy belt and some ballet slippers?
Ethel – I’m afraid I have to jump in here. A belt, especially a wide one, is always good for defining the waistline. And hostess, or palazzo, pants can effectively camouflage calves and thighs that may have become overly fleshy (perhaps from singing with cheeks full of peanut brittle.)
The real problem I have with your plan of attack is the flats. Please, no. Flats are for androgynous waifs. If you simply CANNOT master a spike heel (and I do not see a cause of action by which one could not), it is better to go barefoot, as it will convey a bedroomy effect.
|by Anonymous||reply 53||11/26/2017|
And Ethel, have you considered a cozy caftan?